ABS LEMANIFIK

ABS LEMANIFIK

©DEV VIRAHSAWMY AND ICJM

[ENN KOSMAR KOMIK]

( Version Abreze)

Bann Personaz Reel: Nou Tou.

Bann personaz senbolik: ABS, ZED, FIFI, KLOUN, FIDOU, TIGAR, MARI, FAM, BOYFRENN, GERLFRENN, BANN SIPER-MINI-ABS, BANN MINI-ABS, TOUTSORT KALITE DIMOUN, PROPRIYETER LONGVI, MARSAN SORBE, MARSAN DALPOURI, MARSAN FOTO, ETSETERA, ETSETERA …

SENN 1

Enn plas piblik. Ler rido leve, lasenn vid net. Enn lafoul dimoun sort dan loditwar galoupe an dezord, mont lor lasenn. Bouskilad, dimoun tonbe. Boukou mouvman, boukou tapaz.
No 1: Eta vans twa! Pa bar sime.

No 2: To tro mari twa? Faner!

No 1: Taler mo kas to lagel!

No 2: Seye!

No 3: Aaachoum! (Li mous so nene.)

No 2: Aret fann to mikrob!

No 1:Vey to zafer!

No 4: Tansion mo beki! Ou pou fer mwa perdi lekilib.

No 5: Ki lekilib to pe koze? (Li ris beki la, No 4 tonbe.) Bien bon pou twa. … Eta fam al vann to marsandiz enn lot plas! Pa fer lagign isi.

No 6: Fer lagign? Yer swar to ti koz enn lot koze.

No 5: Ti pey twa pou sa. Dayer li ti gagn enn gou rans.

No 6: Rans pa rans to pou revini.

No 5: To pey mwa ‘si tro ser.

No 6: Koz touzour bonom. Ant seki dir ek seki fer …

No 1: Donn mwa enn dam ar twa.

No 3: To pa per mo mikrob?

No 2: Krever!

No 1: Twa bous to lagel!

No 4: Dir li rann mwa mo beki.

No 5: Vinn sers li tomem, vilen bachara.

No 6: Wey, samem to bon. Fer dominer ar seki feb. Lagel gran. Touleres tipti.

No 5: Eta move laryaz, ki to dir?

No 6: Rann li so beki. Zis aswar ki to bizen beki twa.

No 5: Ki to dir? Ki to dir?

No 6: Pa koz for. Taler mo larg to pese.

No 5: Kisannla pou kwar twa move laryaz.

No 1: Ki arive? Li bizen beki aswar?

No 5: Twa vey to zafer.

No 1: Bien bizen vey to zafer. Li tro tipti, li kapav perdi.

No 5: To’le mo kas to lagel?

No 2: Wey do, fann ar li.

No 3: Aaachoum! (Li mous so nene.)

No 4: Rene, Rene mous so nene al vakarne.

No 3: Get sa lever la ranpe! Ki arive, to peyna lipie pou marse?

No 6: Li omwen, mem so lipie pa bon, lezot zafer marse. Li pa bizen beki aswar.

No 3: Twa ki twa?

No 6: Aret fer to zess. Twa, zis to nene ki koule.

No 5: Li kouma enn krab avarye.

No 7: (Li pe zwe lagitar, sante.)

“Poz to lalev lor mo poem

Fer mo sante vinn eternel.

Poz to lalev lor mo lavi

Fer mo la … … …”

Non! Non! Non! Li pa bon!

No 5: To pa bon! To pa bon! … Aret fatig zorey dimoun.

No 6: Les li trankil. Li omwen, li kone ki li anvi.

No 7: “Poz to lalev lor mo poem

Fer mo poem vinn imortel.”

No 3: Ase radote ta gopia!

No 7: “Poz to lalev lor mo poem

Fer mo sante vinn eternel.

Poz to lalev lor mo lamour

Fer mo lavi vinn imortel.”

Mo kwar mo’nn gagn li. … Wi, … fer mo lavi vinn imortel.

No 1: Ras so lagitar! Li pe tro amerd tou dimoun.

No 2: Wey, nou fann ar li!

No 3,4,5: Fer li manz so lagitar!

No 6: Fou li lape, mo dir zot.

No 7: Mo lagitar, mo lagitar! Pa fer sa, zot pou dezakord li.

No 1: Tann li koze! ‘Dezakord’. Ki dezakord? Ala pou twa!

No 2: Pas ar mwa, mo met enn gorl.

No 7: Pa fer sa! Zot pe kas li.

No 3: Aaachoum! Akonpagn mo terne.

No 6: Donn sa isi bann sovaz. … Rann li so lagitar. Rann li mo dir zot.

No 2: Vinn pran li si to kapav. … Chooou! To’nn rate. … Ala li laba!

No 4: Li ar mwa aster. … Vinn sers li mo zoli. Vini! Vini! Vini! … Kout, kout, kout, kout, kooout, kout! … Non, li nepli la, … li laba!

No 5: Eta langra, to’si to rod zwe?

No 8: M mm mmmmm mo s sss sssss si mmmm mo ‘le zzzzz zou zzzwe …

No 5: Ala beze! Tou bann andikape pe vinn kas soulezon!

No 6: Zot bien ansam.

No 8: P ppppp Pa … pa pa pa

No 1: Ki papa to pe rode?

No 8: PPPPP Pas sss mommmmmmm bbbb bou boul lllll la

No 4: Eta to pa kapav koz kouma ttt tootou … dddd di mmm moun. Ala beze! Mo pe vinn gaga.

No 7: Get ki zot pe fer! Rann lagitar la.

No 6: Hen, pran to lagitar. Sorti isi. Pa enn plas pou twa sa.

No 8: K kkk kasssss ssss sou llll lezon.

No 5: Tomem kaser soulezon.

No 1: Wey, kas so lagel.

No 3: Aaaaach … choum

No 4: Aret fann to mikrob!

No 3: Vey to zafer!

No 1: Taler mo kas to lagel!

No 2: Seye si to kapav!

No 3: Aaaaaaaachoum!

No 4: Rann mwa mo beki!

No 5: Vinn sers li tomem! … Bachara!

No 6: Zot ankor deryer midi.

No 7: Get ki zot finn fer ar mo lagitar!

No 8: Pa … pa .. pp kkkk kkkk k…

No 1: To dis finn reye?

No 6: Zot pa onte.

No 7: Poz to lalev lor mo poem.

No 6: To pe dir sa ar mwa?

No 7: Fer mo sante vinn imortel.

No 5: Les li trankil. … Li fer lamour ar so labous.

No 6: Ferm to labous! Sa ‘si to pa kapav fer.

No 3: Aaaaaachoooooooooom!

No 5: Ala li rekoumanse.

No 2: Aret fann to mikrob.

No 1: Mo finn plen! Mo finn plen!

No 2: Mo’si.

No 3: Mo plis ki plen.

No 4: Mo’si.

No 5: Tou dimoun plen.

No 8: Mmmmmm Mo ppp plllll plllllll.

No 4: Korek nou finn konpran.

No 8: BBBB … bbbbbbb … be

No 1: Ki pou fer?

No2: Ki pou fer?

No 3: Abe ki pou fer?

No 4: Dir mwa ki pou fer?

No 5: Kisannla kone ki pou fer?

No 8: BBbbb … bbbbb

No 3: To ankor ar to b … b … b.

No 1: Personn pa kone ki bizen fer?

No 2: Ki bizen fer?

No 3: Aaaaachoooooum! Ki bizen fer?

No 4: Wey, ki bizen fer?

No 8: B… be …bi…

No 5: Wey ki bizen fer?

No 8: BBBB … bi … bizzzzzzzz ..

No 1: Ayo BonDie! Ki bizen fer?

No 8: B … bi …. B.b ,bizen … nnn .. enn … s ..ssssss sover.

No 1: Ki li pe dir?

No 5: Bizen enn sover.

No 3: Ki sover?

No 2: Enn sover ta!

No 4: Ki sover li pe dir?

No 1: Pa kone.

No 4: Li pe dir bizen enn sover.

No 1: Enn sover!

No 2: Bizen enn sover?

No 3: Bizen enn sover?

No 4: Bizen enn sover!

No 5: Bizen enn sover!

No 1: Bizen enn sover!

Toudimoun: Bizen enn sover! Bizen enn sover! Bizen enn sover! (Zot sant: Bizen enn sover/Degaze do/Bizen enn sover.)

(Zekler, loraz. Enn gran tapaz mekanik. Tou dimoun panik. Dimoun galoup dan tou direksion. Bouskilad. Tapaz la vinn pli for. Tou dimoun zet lekor anba. Zot pe tranble kouma fey. Zis No 6 ek 7 res dibout ek get dan direksion kot tapaz la sorti. Tapaz la vinn infernal. Tou dimoun bous zorey. Enn dimoun an redingot ek sapo oform desann dan enn laparey grinse-grinse. Li sorti dan laparey la. Li peyna laz, li peyna vizaz ou plito li ena tou laz ek tou vizaz. Li deborde ar lenerzi. Li dibout e get zot ar enn sourir paternalis. Li apel ABS.)

ABS: Ki arive bann zanfan? Zot finn perdi zot lalang? Koumsa ki zot akeyir zot bienfeter?

No 8: Be … b bbbbb be … bbbe

No 1: Bous to labous ta. Taler li pou kwar nou tou kabri isi.

No 2: Fann ar li!

No 3: Aaaaachoum! Pardon!

No 4,5: Shuuuuuuuut! Aret fann mikrob. Misie la pou amerde.

No 3: Be mo anrime.

No 4: Rann mwa mo beki.

(Enn brouhaha napa badine. Tou dimoun rekoumans koze anmemtan.)

ABS: (Otoriter) Silaaaaaans! (silans konple) Mo’le enn silans konple san tapaz. … Twa kouma to apele?

No 8: Nnnnn … nnnnim … rrrrro

No 5: Li apel No 8.

ABS: Sannla, sannla, sannla?

No 5: 2,3,4.

ABS: Twa?

No 5: No 5.

ABS: Lezot?

No 5: Zot pankor gagn nimero.

ABS: Ah maler. Mo ti kone ena problem. Me pa per; mwa ABS mo ena solision pou zot problem. ABSOLIMAN! Sakenn pou gagn so nimero. Rapel! Nimero li endispansab pou ki sakenn konn so idantite, so rasinn, so lavenir. Enn sans mo la! … Twa laba, kifer to pe dibout?

No 6: Mo pas mo lavi lor mo ledo. Kan kiksoz extra arive mo prefer diboute. Kas routinn!

ABS: Koste la! Les mo yam to vizaz ek to eksetera.

No 7: Fifi, pa koste ar li. Enn mazisien danzere sa.

FIFI: Pa per twa!

ABS: Kouma to apele?

FIFI: No 6.

ABS: Enn bien zoli nom. … Pou enn bien zoli lekor. Vinn pli pre, less mo vwar twa enn gro gorze. … Li kisannla li?

FIFI: Ki li?

ABS: Li, laba.

FIFI: No 7.

ABS: Li pa konn koze?

FIFI: Zis kan neseser li koze e ler li koze zoli parol sorti.

No 5: Fos! Li koz ninport.

ABS: Silaaaaaans!

No 5: Wi gran sef!

ABS: Apre sa aret apel mwa gran sef. Mo apel ABS… A…B…S. ABS Lemanifik. Me ABS pou tou dimoun. Tou dimoun egal. Zis mwa ki siperyer.

No 5: Wi Gran Sef ABS. … Gran Sef ABS … Pa ankoler Gran Sef ABS. Dir nou kot ou sorti, kifer ou la. Pa ankoler.

ABS: Ditou, mo garson. Dibout! (Tou dimoun dibout) Non! Zis No 5 dibout! Lezot, plat anba. No 5, to intelizan. Mo kontan twa. Giji, giji! Depi lontan mo pe yam zot depi mo niaz. Ler mo trouve zot pe rod mwa mo desann, mo vini. Senp!

No 6: Nou rod ou?

ABS: Yes my girl.

No 3: Aaachouuuuum! Limem nou sover

(Tou dimoun koumans sante: Limem nou sover/ Limem nou sover … etc. Zot diboute, sante, danse, tap tanbour. Kafouyaz zeneral.)

ABS: Stop! Chombo! Arete! Disiplinn zanfan! Disiplinn! Atennsionn! Met lalinn. (Tou dimoun met lalinn apart No 7.) … Twa No 7, to pa met lalinn. To tro spesial twa. Taler mo koup to … sipa ki ete. Me pa traka. To pou sanze. Mo pou fer twa sanze. Pa vre li pou sanze? Vre pa vre?

TOU DIMOUN: Laverite, li pou sanze. (Zot rekoumans sante, danse: Laverite li pou sanze/ Laverite li pou sanze.)

ABS: Silaaaaaaansssssss! Amenn mwa dan mo pale. (Zot met li lor zot zepol, sarye li lao-lao, sant ‘limem nou sover’ sorti. Res zis No 6 ek 7 lar lasenn.)

No 7: (Li pe sey repar so lagitar.) Li’nn fouti!

FIFI: Zed, kifer to pa fer kouma tou dimoun? Swiv mwa, nou al ansam ar zot. … To pe ekout mwa?

ZED: Mo bizen aranz enn lot lagitar. … Enn kote li bon sannla finn kase. So son ti enpe maf. Depi lontan mo ti bizen aranz enn lot.

FIFI: Lagitar! Lagitar! Peyna zis lagitar dan lavi.

ZED: To rapel, FIFI. Mo papa ti donn mwa sa … ti montre mwa zwe. Bonom la ti enn zwer. Mo sey mars lor so tras. So soulie tro gran pou mwa.

FIFI: To lamizik zoli Zed.

ZED: Pa osi zoli ki lamizik mo papa. Ena boukou aprann reste pou aprann. Mo pou ariv so oter enn zour. Me bizen zefor, travay, pratik. Bizen enn nouvo lagitar.

FIFI: Pli tar nou koz sa. La ena enn problem. Tou dimoun finn antour nouvo sef, samem ABS. Zis twa ek mwa andeor. Ena kees ladan.

ZED: Get sa FIFI, swiv to leker. Si li dir twa swiv li, be swiv li. Pa get mwa.

FIFI: Be kan twa to pou swiv mwa?

ZED: Ki to’le dir?

FIFI: Tou bann zom swiv mwa kouma mo lonbraz, twa to ignor mwa mem kan mo sipliy twa swiv mwa. Mo lekor pa atir twa?

ZED: Nou lespri pa’nkor zwenn.

FIFI: Lespri zwenn? Ala to rekoumans to kouyonad. Kifer to pa fer kouma lezot, kouma bann nimero?

ZED: Mo pa enn nimero, enn bout papie dan sak tirazosor.

FIFI: Be ki to ole?

ZED: Nanye! … Tou! … Non. Pa kone.

FIFI: To enn pagla, twa.

(Li pran sime sorti. Ler li pre pou disparet …)

ZED: Fifi!

FIFI: Wi!

ZED: Twa’si to pa enn nimero, enn bout papie dan sak tirazosor.

(Fifi lev so zepol, sorti.)

SENN 2

Mem plas piblik. Enn dimoun rantre. Li bien abiye. Li paret inpasian. Tanzantan li get so mont. Li pe arpant lasenn. Li pas divan enn malere ki pe asiz dan enn kwen san pran li kont. Li marse lizie lor so mont, tap ar lotla, tonbe.

MISIE: Eh foutou, gete kot ou asize!

MALERE: Pardon misie.

MISIE: To rezenbe? Taler mo klak twa!

MALERE: Mo pa’nn trouv ou misie.

MISIE: Kot to met to lizie? Dan to fes?

MALERE: Pa trouv kler misie.

MISIE: Si pa trouv kler, res kot twa.

MALERE: Peyna kot mwa. … Akoz samem mo finn vinn get Misie ABS.

MISIE: To kwar Gran Sef ABS ena letan pou perdi. Fonn depi isi … To pa tande? (Enn lavwa dan oparler: Bravo, bravo, bravo. Souden enn MINI-ABS paret. Li enn ti bonom ar redingot ek sapo oform. So lenz ek so sapo tro gran pou li. So louk ridikil.) Ooooh MINI-ABS donn mwa ou benediksion!

MINI-ABS: Mwa MINI-ABS, mesaze spesial Gran Sef ABS Lemanifik, ena loner ek plezir inform twa ki to aplikasion finn preske aksepte. Gran Sef ABS dan so grander ABSoli ek so sazes ABSoliman ABSoli finn dimann mwa konplet lanket lor to lwayote, devosion, devouman pou sivilizasion ABSoliman Manifik.

MISIE: Dan mo aplikasion mo ti fer serman lor la.

MINI-ABS: Rapor sekre dir ki to tro atase ar to fam. Santiman peyna plas dan Manifika ABS.

MISIE: Be ki bizen fer?

MINI-ABS: Les mo reflesi. … Wi, sel solision. Donn to fam ABS an kado.

MISIE: Mo fam?

MINI-ABS: Tro tar. To’nn ezite. Fel! F… E… L. Fel. Mo bizen fer mo rapor.

MISIE: Pa kapav tini rapor la? Mo pou fer ou leker kontan.

MINI-ABS: Tantativ koripsion! Pli grav ankor. Lesafo!

MISIE: (Li koz dan zorey MINI-ABS)

MINI-ABS: Mo trouv to transformasion bien pozitif. Mo kwar mo pou fer enn rapor favorab. Vinn ar mwa lor podiom.

MALERE: Misie, fer mwa zwenn Gran Sef ABS! Rann enn servis.

MISIE: Servis rann dan legliz.

(Lafoul koumans ranpli lasenn.)

Propriyeter longvi: Lokasion, lokasion longvi. Enn roupi segonn. Lokasion, lokasion longvi. Get ABS ar ou prop lizie. Benediksion lizie. Lokasion, lokasion longvi.

Marsan sorbe: Sorbe, sorbe, sorbe, sorbe! Sorbe SiperABS. Bon pou latet. Sorbe, sorbe, sorbe, sorbe!

Lavwa ABS: (Dan oparler) Silaaaaaaaans! … Kouma mo finn dir zot, lavenir manifika li trouv dan lwayote. San lwayote pa kapav ena progre. Akoz samem Bondie finn fer sa de mo la rime. Kan de mo rime ena armoni, balans, kadans, vakans, … revans. Donk peyna okenn dout ki progre ek lwayote finn marye pike pou amenn progre lwayote. Lwayote, samem pilie nou sosiete. San lwayote pa kapav ena sekirite, feminite, militarite, iniformite, responsabilite. Kifer soley tourn otour later? Akoz lwayote. Kifer liver swiv lete? Akoz lwayote. Kifer fam swiv zom? Akoz lwayote. Akoz kifer zot bizen swiv mwa? Akoz kifer zot bizen bwar mo parol? Akoz kifer zot? Koze! Akoz kifer? (Lafoul kriye: Akoz lwayote.) Mo pa’nn bien tande. Akoz kifer?

Lafoul: Akoz lwayote.

Lavwa ABS: Pli for! Akoz kifer?

Lafoul: Akoz lwayote!

Lavwa ABS: Saaaameeem!

MARSAN DALPOURI: Dalpouri, dalpouri so. … Manz dalpouri SiperABS. Benediksion pou lestoma. Li geri tou maladi.

(Dimoun galoupe, antoure pou aste.)

Lavwa ABS: Silaaaaaaaans! … Aret koz gonaz, vann gonaz, manz gonaz. Ala mo dir zot la! … Depi lontan dan mo niaz mo ti pe louk zot. Zot ti malere, perdi dan karo vavang. Dezord ti pe fer akter lor trotwar, dan marenwar, dan lespwar, dan dezespwar, aswar dan tar. Mo ti pe get zot, mo ti bien sagrin zot. Zot ti bien bizen enn sover me tank ki zot pa ti pare mo pa ti kapav vini. Kan enn zour dan zot lespri mo zimaz ti pran form, mo dir momem: “ABS sa bann malere la bien bizen twa. Al ed zot.” Mo ti bien dan mo niaz. Mo finn kit mo biennet pou vinn sekour zot. Kifer? Akoz sakenn bizen konn so responsabilite. RESPONSABILITE! Mo finn pran mo responsabilite. Aster zot tou ena responsabilite san fay anver lwayote ki zot bizen ena pou mwa. San enn responsabilite zot lwayote pou fonn kouma konfeti ver kraze. San responsabilite peyna lwayote, sekirite ousa progre. Responsabilite samem prinsip No 2 dan mo Manifika. Konpran bien. Disan ki fer lwayote marse se responsabilite; oxizenn ki fer poumon lwayote fonksione li apel responsabilite; lintelizans ki fer servo lwayote marse se responsabilite. Seki peyna responsabilite dan li peyna drwa respire, panse ousa viv. Dakor, pa dakor? … Ki arive? Zot finn vinn gounga? Pli for! Dakor pa dakor?

Lafoul: Dakor! Dakor! Dakor mo bourzwa!

Lavwa ABS: Fer bon zanfan, Papa ABS pou donn zot gato. … Bon aster mo ena enn nouvel enportan pou zot …

Marsan Foto: Foto! Foto! Foto! Aste foto ABS. Mari ABStrak. Benediksion dan lakaz. Tifi gagn demann; garson labours …

Lavwa ABS: Silaaaaaaaaaans! … Lwayote ek responsabilite pa ase. Bizen organize. Zot ole viv kouma avan? San divan dan koutvan san paravan? Nooooooon! Non! Non! Non! Zot ole divan lanterman soufle siendan dan moulin-avan? Zot ole? Koze! Ole, pa’le?

Lafoul: Pa’leeeeeeeeee!

Lavwa ABS: Ki vedir organize? Vedir lord dan lwayote, responsabilite, disiplinn, ek zot kone. Bizen enn program anti-diformite, ‘Iniformite san Disparite’. Pou met program anpratik mo finn kre enn larme MINI-ABS, solda militan dan Lafwa Manifik.

MARSAN DALPOURI: Manze, manze, manze dalpouri so-so. Manze dalpouri iniformite.

Marsan sorbe: Sorbe, sorbe, sorbe, sorbe. Sorbe san disparite.

Marsan foto: Foto, foto, foto. Aste foto mirakilite!

Lavwa ABS: Silaaaaaaaaans! … Bon bann zanfan. Zordi mo donn zot enn zour konze pou zot reflesi lor mo program ‘Iniformite san Disparite’. Rapel mo mesaz: Lwayote, ankor lwayote, touzour lwayote. Mersi.

(Aplodisman. Lafoul kriye. Zot sante: Lwalwalwayote/ tetetetelwa/ lwalwalwayote/ tetetelwa etc.)

SENN 3

FIFI: Ki to finn fer tousa letan la?

ZED: Mo finn ranz enn lot lagitar. So son peper.

FIFI: Zed kan to pou grandi? To nek pans lagitar. … To kone li pe rod twa?

ZED: Kisannla?

FIFI: ABS.

ZED: Kifer?

FIFI: To kone kifer.

ZED: (Sey so lagitar) Kouma to trouv so son?

FIFI: Get sa Zed, mo finn vinn get twa pou enn zafer serye. Pli tar nou va koz to lagitar.

ZED: To pe vinn tro serye. To nepli gagn letan apresie lamizik … To kone! Mo finn fini konpoz sante la.

FIFI: Ki sante?

ZED: Samem se ki mo ti pe konpoze zour ki li ti vini.

FIFI: Kisannla?

ZED: Samem … to kone … ar so palto ek sapo boufon.

FIFI: Shouuuuut! Pa koz koumsa! Ena maler ladan.

ZED: Kapav konpoz enn sante lor li!

FIFI: Akoz samem mo finn vinn get twa. … Li finn … dir mwa … dir twa

ZED: Li finn avoy twa. To travay fakter ar li?

FIFI: Pa fakter. Mo so … so … MMMMMMMMINI-ABS Feminite.

ZED: To finn vinn enn nimero!

FIFI: Aksepte so lof.

ZED: Ki lof?

FIFI: Vinn so MINI-ABS Kreativite.

ZED: Ki sa simagre la?

FIFI: Aksepte, lerla twa ek mwa nou kapav viv ansam.

ZED: Bizen ABSe pou nou viv ansam?

FIFI: Pa fer jok ar so nom. Ena mous partou.

ZED: ABSird.

FIFI: Ki mo dir li?

ZED: Dir li … Non! …

(Li pran so lagitar, koumans zwe)

Dir li, dir li …

‘Poz to lalev lor mo poem

fer mo sante vinn imortel

poz to lamour lor mo lavi

fer mo lavi vinn eternel

dimoun partou zot tro serye

dimoun partou zot tro prese

dimoun partou zot lespri lour

pa gagn letan pou pans lamour

Poz to lalev lor mo poem

fer mo sante vinn imortel

poz to lamour lor mo lavi

fer mo lavi vinn eternel’

FIFI: Dir li sa?!?

 SENN 4

Renion bann MINI-ABS.

MINI-ABS 1: Ena tro boukou MINI-ABS. Organizasion pe koumans rat-rate. Mo propoze ki nou dimann Gran Sef ABS, dan so gran sazes aksepte nominasion detrwa Siper MINI-ABS pou kontol bann MINI-ABS.

MINI-ABS 2: Enn lide revolisioner!

MINI-ABS 3: Mo plennman satisfe.

Mini ABS 4: Istorik! Sa pou amenn likidite dan yerarsi ABStokrasi. Nou travay enn stratezi global promosion sosial pou bar larout fristrasion e anmemtan gagn soutien bann eleman dinamik, pozitif, progresif …

MINI-ABS 1: MINI-ABS 4, to pa kapav koz enn langaz sinp?

MINI-ABS 4: MINI-ABS 1, mo’le dir ki dan prosesis transformasion bann nominasion ek bann apelasion, nou ti kapav inzekte enn nouvo konsep ki pou dinamiz striktir responsabilite ek anmemtan permet …

MINI-ABS 1: Ki to’le foutou?

MINI-ABS 4: Pa kapav kre enn job MINI-ABS Jinior pou … mo … fa … fam.

MINI-ABS 1: Enn propozision tro grav. Mo propoz ki nou nom enn komite elit pou etidie sa problem la. Ki lezot problem? (telefonn sone) Alo! Mo pa finn dir zot pa deranz mwa? … Ki problem 008, MINI-ABS Feminite. … Li pa’le manz. … Ki beze lor nou…. Vinn zwenn mwa toutswit. (Li poz resepter). Treboul!

MINI-ABS 2: Kisannla sa MINI-ABS 1? Dir mwa mo sot so likou.

MINI-ABS 1: ABS finn dir fale pa pronons so nom.

Bann MINI-ABS: Li!

MINI-ABS 1: Limem.

SENN 5

Lor radio ek televizion.

Nou interonp nou program ABSoliman Manifik pou lir enn kominike ki sorti Mahal Manifika.

“Tou pe mars bien dan Lanpir Manifika. Bann nimero ordiner sou direksion bann MINI-ABS Jinior, Bann MINI-ABS Jinior sou direksion bann MINI-ABS, Bann MINI-ABS sou direksion bann Siper MINI-ABS ek bann Siper MINI-ABS sou direksion Gran Sef ABS Lemanifik pe fer enn travay imans pou fer program iniversel ‘Iniformite san Disparite’ vinn enn realite. Tou korek. Me ena detrwa eleman negatif ki pe anpes nou travay mars korek-korek. Me pli grav ena enn vilen malang, enn santi pi, enn lagli-lagli ki pe met baraz lor sime progre, pe tap kout kouto dan ledo. Sa nimakarram la bizen eliminn li. Me Gran Sef ABS Lemanifik dan so gran sazes rezet violans. Li prefer solision artistiko-lingwistiko-politik. Bizen eliminn dernie let alfabet dan nou lang. Olie servi dernie let alfabet, ranplas li par ‘s’, ousa ‘f’, ousa ‘v’.

Viv lalit kont dernie let alfabet!

Viv gran lespri nou gran Sef ABS Lemanifik!

Viv kanpagn anti-diformite!

Viv iniformite san disparite!

Signe: FENES LOR BAF

Mari: To’nn konpran ki’ete fenes lor baf?

Fam: Dimann nou vwazen. Li bien ar zot. Li kapav dir nou.

Mari: Sa! Fer atansion ar li. Mo tann dir li travay mous pou bannla. Prefer mo al get Zed, li li pou konn explik mwa sa … Manze finn pare?

Fam: Non, diri lor dife.

Mari: Fer vit! … Ki to fout enn lazourne dan lakaz?

Fam: Dernie la malad.

Mari: Toulezour mem kouyonad. Mo pe al laboutik. Fer manier manze la finn pare ler mo revini.

VWAZEN: (rantre koumadir li kot li) Bonfour! Fot vinn gagn mesaf fordi?

Mari: Ki to gagne, to malad?

VWAZEN: Fot fafer sa?

Fam: Ou koz drol. Ou lagorz malad?

VWAZEN: Lagorf!

Fam: (ar so mari) Ki li gagne?

Mari: Ferm to lagel, okip to menaz.

VWAZEN: Menaf!

Mari: Hen!

VWAZEN: Menaf!

Mari: Ki to pe zaze?

VWAZEN: Fafe!

Mari: (ar so fam) Li pe koz enn lot langaz.

VWAZEN: Kof! … Langaf! … Fot pa finn get televizion? Pou lavansman nou program iniversel, nou bifen aret servi fonem ki reprefante par dernie let alfabet.

Mari: Annnnn! Nou bizen aret koz nou lang e koz zis fonem.

VWAZEN: To kouma li twa. Nek rod fer interesan.

Mari: Li? Kisannla?

VWAZEN: Pa fwe bet.

Fam: Nou pa pe konpran nanye.

Mari: Twa ferm to lagel!

VWAZEN: Pa koz koumsa. Li kont regleman. Tansion Gestabso!

Mari: Ki ete sa?

VWAZEN: Gard Spesial Pou Trap ABS So Opofan.

Mari: Be ki mo’nn fer?

VWAZEN: Seki to fek fer.

Mari: Ki zafer?

VWAZEN: Servi fonem interdi.

Mari: Ki fonem interdi?

VWAZEN: Ayo ABSoli! … Bon to va debrouy twa ar Gestabso.

Fam: Pa fer sa. Pardonn so erer. Vwazen bizen ed vwazen.

VWAZEN: Koripsion! Ayo ABSoli! (li sorti)

Mari: Akof twa get bef lor mwa.

Fam: To’si to koz bizar?

Mari: To pa konn fonem malediksion?

Fam: Non!

Mari: Ki dernie let alfabet?

Fam: ‘Z’ non?

Mari: Kisannla apel Zed?

Fam: ‘Z’?

Mari: Zed, Z…E…D.

Fam: Annn! Sa Zed la! Nou Zed!

Mari: Nou Zed? Kan li ti ‘nou Zed’?

Fam: Li pa fami ar nou?

Mari: Sa fame!

Fam: Kifer Zed pa bon?

Mari: Gran Sef ABS pa fer li konfians.

Fam: Ayo Bondie! Mo pa konpran zot komeraz!

Mari: Bifin dir, ‘Ayo ABSoli, mo pa konpran fot komeraf’.

Fam: Be kouma nou pou apel nou garson? So nom Zizi.

Mari: Senp! Apel li FIFI.

Fam: Aret to zes do ta.

Mari: Pa zes. Bifin dir … dir …

Fam: Bef sa!

 SENN 6

Dan kazern santral. MINI-ABS Sekirite ek so bann zom.

MINI-ABS: Mo konn vot tou isi. Mo konn tou vot boubou. Vot lwayote bivin san fay. Mo pa pou toler indisiplinn.

Nimero ordiner: MINI-ABS Sekirite, onom mo bann koleg e anmonnom personel, mo swet ou bienveni e felisit ou pou ou promosion.

MINI-ABS: Who art thou? Speak now or tais twa forever.

Nimero Ordiner: Ou serviter lwayal, Nimero Ordiner 18.

MINI-ABS: Nimero Ordiner, mo nom twa sekreter avi enn stennding komiti permanan pou reorganif organifasion. … Gran Sef ABS dan so safes finn dimann mwa netway karo eleman negatif. Gestabso pe amenn li isi. Fot, fot nek fis manf pistas get sinema. Mo fer li debal so sak 2 minit kat. Marke garde.

(Bann gard Gestabso rantre ar Zed ki ansene ek bayone.)

MINI-ABS: (Fer letour Zed ki pe dibout omilie lasenn.) So it’s you! To pa reponn kan mo kov ar twa? Tête dure hein! N’est-ce-pas! Mo pou fer twa kove. Mwa MINI-ABS Sekirite mo pou larg to lalang. Sinon mo pou larg to lekours. To pou kove, to pa pou kofe? Kose!

ZED: (Silans)

MINI-ABS: (Koz dan so zorey) Koze pa fer mwa perdi pwen divan mo bann sibaltern. … Han! To rod fer mari! Mo pou montre twa. (Ar so sibaltern) Eh twa laba, vinn la. … (Ar Zed) Mo donn twa enn dernie sans.

ZED: (silans)

MINI-ABS: (Ar so sibaltern) Ekrir enn trak difamatwar, plen ar insilt kont Gran Sef ABS Lemanifik.

Sibaltern: Sef, ena kees ladan.

MINI-ABS: Tais-twa espes de laservel mwano! Met signatir ‘Z’.

Sibaltern: Annnnnn! Samem tou sef?

MINI-ABS: Wi … Non! To marye, to selibater?

Sibaltern: Marye sef.

MINI-ABS: Ki laf to fam ena?

Sibaltern: Mem laf ki mwa.

MINI-ABS: Ki laf to’ena?

Sibaltern: 20 an sef.

MINI-ABS: Ayo maler! Married at twenty! Diformite absoli. … Al sers to fam vini.

Sibaltern: Yes Sir!

 SENN 7

Gran renion SIPER-MINI-ABS ek MINI-ABS

MINI-ABS: MINI-ABS Sekirite riporting Sir. Mo finn fini interogatwar, kont interogatwar, nespa. I find him guilty of high trizonn. Li finn konfes so malpraktis, maladres, melankoli … so nimakaram, so … so endisiplim, so enlwayote. Ena osi enn trak ki koulout so serkey.

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Pe al tro vit. Gran Sef ABS finn dir li pou okip sa kees la limem.

MINI-ABS: Get ki li’nn ekrir la. … Anti-diformite enn abse; ABS enn absirdite.

(Protestasion, lakoler, menas, dezord zeneral. Enn gran tapaz. ABS desann depi lao.)

ABS: Chers amis absjour! (Tou dimoun reponn absjour) Gran moman ki nou tou ti pe atann … depi ki lavi, lavi; depi ki later, later; depi ki dimoun, dimoun … finn anfin arive. Mo plennman satisfe ki sekirite, disiplinn, organizasion, responsabilite, feminite, iniformite san disparite finn vinn realite. Mo plennman satisfe ki zot tou ere, ki anfen nou kapav kre dan so totalite, globalite Lanpir Manifisite ABSoli. Apartir aster, zis aster ki ekziste. Moman prezan permanan. Donk mo dekrete ki zot tou, grasa mwa, finn vinn eternel. MINI-ABS-Sekirite fer to rapor.

MINI-ABS: Toukorek apart enn eleman negatif-sibversif.

ABS: I know! I know! The brightest fell. Alas!

MINI-ABS: Pa Alas sa, li sa.

ABS: Dan mo serenite ena enn mini-mini miligram sagrin koze par enn grin disab ki pe anpes listwar arete pou permanantiz moman absoli. Mo zanfan prefere, mo dofen pe refiz kolabore. Zed, Zed kefeur tu me fais soufrir?

MINI-ABS: Gran Sef ABS, ou finn pronons so nom.

ABS: Normal, biensir! Zot zot peyna drwa, mo fabrikan drwa, mo ena tou drwa. Zed, Zed mo gate lapli la tonbe; reste dormi to dormi dan kwen, mo dormi dan bor. Mwa mo koumansman, twa to lafen. Nou de nou nou pil ek fas; 25 sou ki fer enn roupi.

MINI-ABS: Li finn konfese.

ABS: Sa se lepase. Yer finn fini mor. Koz prezan permanan.

MINI-ABS: Me get sa, Gran Sef ABS.

ABS: Ki zafer?

MINI-ABS: Enn trak!

Ena abse, ena abstre

Pe kas pake, pe kraz jawat.

Ena abse lerwa absird

Ar so mini, ar so maxi

Fer absoli ar ti lespri.

Zot santi pi, zot santi pi.

Adding insult to injury

Zot kol bann sif partou kote

Pou mont lao dan hierarchy.

Zot met baton, zot tap kouto

Kouba parsi, kouba parla.

Pa ekout zot, vinn mars ar mwa

Vinn apiy mwa, nou devir bol.

Signe: ‘Z’

ABS: Zed twa ki finn ekrir sa. Mo ti kwar to enn poet. How disappointing!

MINI-ABS: Nespa!

ABS: Twa, choup-chap!

MINI-ABS: Ki ou desivion?

ABS: Desivion? Desivion? Aaan! To’le dir desizion. To pa kapav koz kouma dimoun sivilize?

MINI-ABS: Be, Be, Beeee!

ABS: Ki ariv twa, to finn vinn kabri? … Atann! Li sign Z, mo’si mo pou sign Z e mo pou krwaz mo Z ar so Z. Swastika ousa X dan kare? Zot trouve? Zed li endispansab pou mo zeni kreater. Donn li so lagitar e les li sante dan so volier dore. (Enn gran volier dore desann.)

MINI-ABS: Wi Gran sef ABS.

ABS: Sa moniman la pou res isi kouma enn sinbol permanan mo prezans permanan. (ABS rant dan so masinn ki dekole, disparet. Tou lantouraz ABS antour volier dore.)

MINI-ABS: Viktwar! Kanpagn anti-diformite is a complete success.

FIFI: Zed, mo kapav fer kiksoz pou twa?

MINI-ABS: MINI-ABS-Feminite ou pe komet traizon.

FIFI: Aret tap latet kont miray. Konpoz so sante. Li pou fou twa lape. Li kontan flatri, flat li.

MINI-ABS: To pe agrav to ka. Mo pe al fer enn rapor. (Tou sorti apart FIFI.)

ZED: FIFI, nou pe viv enn kosmar. Tou sa simagre la li zis enn lafime.

FIFI: To prizon dore, lafime sa?

ZED: Veritab prizon dan zot lespri. FIFI, tir to redingot. Zet li. Enn palto mazik sa. Li pe brouy to lespri, anpes twa trouv kler. Tir li FIFI.

FIFI: To fou! Mo pou touni net!

SENN 8

Zed dan so prizon dore pe sant so sante. De zanfan pe ekout li.

FIDOU: Tigar, nou retourn lakaz. Papa ek mama pou ankoler si zot kone nou finn vinn isi.

TIGAR: Atann FIDOU! Dimann li resante.

FIDOU: Tansion kikenn trouv nou.

TIGAR: Dimann li resante.

FIDOU: To kwar vremem li manz zanfan kouma bolom loulou.

TIGAR: Li finn ouver so lizie. Sove Fidou, sove!

ZED: Non, pa sove zanfan.

FIDOU: Pardon misie, pardon.

ZED: Vinn la, mo sant enn sante pou zot.

TIGAR: Tansion Fidou, tansion li manz nou.

ZED: Manz zot? Kot zot finn gagn sa lide la?

FIDOU: Papa finn dir. Oumem satan.

ZED: Mo resanble satan?

TIGAR: Ou’nn degize kouma mouton me …

FIDOU: Vini Tigar.

ZED: Get laba kisannla pe vini. (Kloun rantre)

KLOUN: Balabalabala kwikwikwi yahoooooooooo! Zed dan prizon dore. Zoli spektak…. Bouzou, bouzou tou zanfan! … He Zed akonpagn mwa, mo sant enn sante.

Seki dernie refiz premie

Bel-bel loyo pe bourzone

Dan so bourzon seki dernie

Pou pran labar pou vinn premie

Seki dernie, seki premie

Zot de kote mem lamone

Mo ti fer sa profesi la

Ar lerwa Lear. Abba! Abba!

Lizie bouse, zorey bloke

Li ti rezet so Cordelia.

ZED: Al sant sa ar nouvo lerwa. Kikfwa li pou ekout twa.

KLOUN: Ti’ena enn lerwa

So nom gate Galimacha.

Kas-kas nikola dan ki labarb!

ZED: To dan enn mari moud zordi.

KLOUN: Depi ki finn deside ki prezan li permanan mo moud finn res parey kouma avan … To kone Zed to tro serye. Fer kouma mwa, mo kasiet tou deryer mo mask. Kan zwazo per, Zed, zot pa pou arete pou ekout twa sante. … To konn zistwar enn mous dimiel ki ti zwenn tase ar bann bourdon? To kone kifer? Li ti dekouver enn nouvo fler me so larenn ti refiz gout nouvo nektar.

FIDOU: Misie Kloun, ki vedir sa?

KLOUN: Pa sey konpran zoli fifi. Mo enn fouka profesionel. Mo koz ninport, fer dimoun riye.

FIDOU: Fer nou riye.

KLOUN: Dir mwa kisannla premie ti kwi diri dan nou pei.

TIGAR: Mo kone! Gran Sef ABS. Ti montre nou dan lekol.

FIDOU: Non! Mama.

KLOUN: Fos! Dife premie ti kwi diri.

TIGAR: Ankor enn!

KLOUN: Dernie. Ti ena enn far ki ti fier so pouvwar. Li tingn so far, les nou modi dan marenwar. Kisannla sa?

FIDOU, TIGAR: (Silans)

KLOUN: Twa Zed?

ZED: (Silans)

KLOUN: Darkling we sank! … Zanfan, zot trouv sa zigoto la? Se nimero zero.

FIDOU: Non, so sante zoli.

KLOUN: Me li finn ferm li dan enn serk e li’nn kasiet serk la dan so latet e li finn bliye kotsa. Fatra la! Zanfan, momem bonom loulou. Si zot pa retourn lakaz, mo pou manz zot. RRAAAAAAAH! Zot pa per?

FIDOU: Misie kloum, ou tro komik.

TIGAR: Ledan mem ou pa ena.

FIDOU: Misie Zed, kifer ou pa pous laport la, sorti? (De zanfan la sorti.)

KLOUN: Mo sir to konn so repons.

ZED: Aret badine!

KLOUN: Badine? Lemonn enn badinaz. Mo fer fouka, dimounn riye; zot kontan, zot donn mwa kas; mo fer zot riy plis; zot bliye zot prop fouka e lerla zot zis trouv fouka lezot.

ZED: To riy to prop fouka, twa?

KLOUN: Non. Mo parey kouma twa. Mo zis trouv fouka lezot. Hen, pran mo mask.

ZED: Kifer kloun?

KLOUN: Met mask kloun pou kasiet to fouka. Lerla to pou kapav riy tomem deryer to mask. Zed to enn boufon, enn bachara.

ZED: Kifer?

KLOUN: Baro prizon finn fer to vizion vinn karodamie. Tikare-tikare, sakenn dan so kare. Me tou pe fonn. Gete to pou trouve.

 SENN 9

Renion MINI-ABS.

MINI-ABS 1: Ki ena lor azanda zordi? Mo get enn kou. Wey! Bizen met anpratik nouvo regleman Gran Sef ABS: “Apartir zordi nanye pa bizen kouma avan.”

MINI-ABS 2: Mo kwar mo’nn konpran porte istorik so instriksion. Kan nou marse fale pa nou get divan. Bizen get deryer. …Koumsa!

MINI-ABS 3: Kapav mars sirlekote, … koumsa.

MINI-ABS 1: Nou bizen asiz lor latab, manz lor sez.

MINI-ABS 2: Non, asiz anba, met lipie lor sez.

MINI-ABS 3: Gro nimero pas avan ti nimero.

MINI-ABS 1: To’le pran mo plas?

MINI-ABS 3: Non, olie 1,2,3,4 zanfan bizen aprann 4,3,2,1.

MINI-ABS 1: Briyan!

MINI-ABS 2: Kan ena enn problem, koumans par solision, lerla fer analiz.

MINI-ABS 3: Lide enn gagn finn mo.

MINI-ABS 1: Redir sa.

MINI-ABS 3: Lide enn gagn finn mo.

MINI-ABS 2: So latet pa bon?

MINI-ABS 3: Fraz lafen par koumans bizen koze kan.

MINI-ABS 1: Pa konpran.

MINI-ABS 3: Mo koumans mo fraz par lafen. Koumansman vinn lafen.

MINI-ABS 1: Nom enn soukomite pou etidie sa problem la.

MINI-ABS 2: Be kimanier mo pou fer lamour ar mo fam?

MINI-ABS 1: Aret fer lamour ar to fam, fer li ar to metres.

MINI-ABS 2: Be li pou parey kouma avan.

SENN 10

KLOUN: To pa pe trouve mem?

ZED: Aret radote do ta!

KLOUN: To pa konn gete. Dimann sa de amoure la ki zot panse. Dir li bann

zanfan.

BOYFRENN: Zed vinn ed nou.

GERLFRENN: Vinn sant dan nou maryaz. … Nou pou apel nou zanfan Zed.

ZED: Pa rod lamerdman.

BOYFRENN: Ki lamerdman?

ZED: ABS pou minn zot boyo.

GERLFRENN: Nou pa per ABS.

ZED: Pa per ABS!

GERLFRENN: Non! Ki ena pou per?

BOYFRENN: Vinn ed nou lamour grandi, vinn ed nou zanfan reve. Vinn ed nou reve. (Fidou ek Tigar retourne.)

ZED: Bann zanfan, mo ti dir zot retourn lakaz. Zot paran pou trakase.

TIGAR: Zot ankor pe travay. Misie Zed sant ‘Enn serin dikap pe kourtiz enn kardinal’.

FIDOU: Non! Mo’le ‘Larivier Tanie’. (Gerlfrenn pran li dan so lebra, sant ‘Larivier Tanie’. Fidou gagn somey.)

GERLFRENN: Zed, mo kapav met li dormi dan ou lakaz?

(Li ouver laport, met li andan.) … Zed, laport la ouver!

 SENN 11

Renion SIPER-MINI-ABS

SIPER-MINI-ABS 1: Mo bann bon Siper-mini-Abs, mo sagren dir zot ki Gran Sef ABS pa pe reflesi. Li finn defann nou tous Zed. So prop kontrer li dir.

SIPER-MINI-ABS 2: Zed pe vinn tro for!

SIPER-MINI-ABS 3: Pouvwar bizen partaze. Bizen dir ABS adopte pouvwar kolezial.

SIPER-MINI-ABS 1: Kisannla pou dir li sa?

SIPER-MINI-ABS 4: Mo kwar ki dan konzonktir aktiel, kot negatif pe vinn pozitif, kot anba pe mont lao, kot eleman sibzektif …

SIPER-MINI-ABS 1: Aret fer koustik lingwistik. Koz senp! Koz prop!

SIPER-MINI-ABS 4: Nou avoy li manze.

SIPER-MINI-ABS 1: Kisannla?

SIPER-MINI-ABS 4: Zed. … E si neseser …

SIPER-MINI-ABS 2: Zot realize ki nou pe rod lager ar ABS?

SIPER-MINI-ABS 4: Si nou fer enn analiz konkre realite konkre, nou pou konstate ki nou predikaman dimann enn solision radikal, enn solision ki pa tike …

SIPER-MINI-ABS 1: Kal mwa avan mo dekal so lamaswar. … Anavan kamarad! Listwar pe fit so kreyon pou ekrir enn nouvo paz. Viv kolezialite SIPER-MINI-ABS! SIPER-MINI-ABS unite!

SENN 12

Renion MINI-ABS

MINI-ABS 1: Mo nepli konpran nanye. Ti dir nou aret servi dernie alfabet me ABS ek so bann SIPER-MINI-ABS servi li ar lapeti.

MINI-ABS 2: Nou amenn kanpagn anti-diformite. Rezilta: Ena plis diformite. Twa to sape MINI-ABS-Feminite. To koz direk ar ABS. To pa bizen pas par SIPER-MINI-ABS.

MINI-ABS-Feminite(FIFI): ABS bizen mwa.

MINI-ABS 1: Li bizen twa?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Momem kontak ant li ek so kontrer. … Zed.

MINI-ABS 1,2: Zed kontrer ABS?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Li bizen Zed pou li ekziste. Si li detrir Zed, li ‘si li fini.

MINI-ABS 2: ABS pa eternel?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Tank Zed ekziste.

MINI-ABS 1: Mo pa konpran!

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Tank to pa konpran, ABS pou zwe sapsiway ar twa. Me mwa mo fer seki mo anvi. Li per mwa.

MINI-ABS 2: ABS per twa? Be kifer to mars ar li?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Pou mo prop lintere. … Kouma pou dir twa? … Dizon mo leker ar Zed, mo lespri ar ABS.

MINI-ABS 1: To mars lor lakord red.

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Lavi enn lakord red. Nou bizen rod nou lekilib.

MINI-ABS 2: Zed pou vinn pli for ki ABS?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Posib! Prezan permanan pa ekziste.

MINI-ABS 1: ABS finn amenn boukou sanzman.

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Wi me nou finn aret reve.

MINI-ABS 2: Avan nou ti pe tro reve.

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Aster nou pa reve ase. Ler Zed pe aprose.

MINI-ABS 1: Be ki pou ariv ABS?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Li pou lamem. Pou atann so ler revini.

MINI-ABS 2: Tousa bien konplike.

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Lavi konplike.

MINI-ABS 1: Bann fam finn fini konpran?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Fam ena mem problem ki zom.

MINI-ABS 2: Be twa?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Mo finn gagn sans. Mo atire par pouvwar ABS me mo leker finn swazir Zed. … Mo kwar mo prefer Zed.

MINI-ABS 1: To kwar Zed pou fer pli bien?

MINI-ABS-Feminite: Pli bien? Pa kone. Diferan? Sirman. … Zot’le zwenn Zed?

MINI-ABS 1,2: Kifer non! Vire manm!

(Zot, ansam ar Fifi, galoupe sorti …)

 SENN 13

( Bann MINI-ABS, ansam ar FIFI, galoupe rantre. Zot esoufle. Zot divan lakaz dore Zed, laport demi-ouver me Zed touzour andan.)

ZED: FIFI, to pou tir sa redingot la, to pa pou tire?

FIFI: Vey to zafer do ta!

ZED: Enn dernie fwa. To pou tir li, wi ou non?

(Li pous laport la, sorti, mars ver Fifi, MINI-ABS-Feminite)

Tir sa mo dir twa. (Redingot desire)

FIFI: (Li sot lor likou Zed) Mo ti kone to kontan mwa!

(Bann SIPER-MINI-ABS rantre kouma voler, pwagnar dan lame.)

SIPER-MINI-ABS 4: Kot Nimero 1?

SIPER-MINI-ABS 2: Li finn al tir enn dan trant dan karo kann.

SIPER-MINI-ABS 3: Li pa’nn vann nou sa?

FIFI: Eh! Ki zot pe fer la?

SIPER-MINI-ABS 4: Enn louvraz serye. Nou’nn gagn lord avoy Zed manze.

FIFI: Zot ole touy ABS?

SIPER-MINI-ABS 4: Wi … Mo’le dir non.

FIFI: Si zot touy Zed, zot touy ABS.

SIPER-MINI-ABS 2,3,4: Sel solision balye karo! Sel solision balye karo! Sel solision balye karo!

(Lager lor lasenn. Finalman 3 SIPER-MINI-ABS finn vinn prizonie. Lafoul andelir rant lor lasenn, sante, danse: ‘Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed! Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed! Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed! Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed! Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed! etc. … Zekler, loraz. ABS desann dan so masinn. Tou dimoun tike. Silans pandan enn moman.)

ZED: ABS, to bizen ale. To sezon finn fini.

LAFOUL: Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed! Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed! Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed! Nou pa’le ABS, nou ole Zed!

Enn gran lagel: Fou li deor, pa bizen li!

ABS: Silaaaaaans! Silaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnssssss! Choupchap! … Chers amis, abswar! Zed, mo tir mo sapo. To ena rezon. Nouvo sezon pe rantre. Mwa mo pa enn ABS kontsezon. Mo retourn lor mo niaz. Depi laba mo pou yam zot. … Zotmem zot pou reapel mwa pou enn lot epizod. ABSOLIMAN! Namaste! Salam! Orevwar! ABSOLIMAN!

(So masinn monte, li disparet. SIPER-MINI-ABS 1, touzour dan so redingot, galoupe rantre.)

SIPER-MINI-ABS 1: Gran Sef ABS, atann mwa. Pa les mwa tousel. … Ayo, pa bate! … Osekour! Misie Zed, dir zot pa bate.

ZED: Ferm li dan mo lakaz!

(Zot ferm li dan lakaz dore. Lafoul andelir sante, danse.)

RIDO

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